Sex Is a Common Dream Symbol, Says Dream Analyst, David Rivinus

Sexual behavior in dreams, either graphic or implied, is quite common in dreams, says dream analyst, David Rivinus. “Dreamers are often startled—either pleasantly or disconcertingly—about sexual activities they are engaged in in their dreams.” According to Rivinus, having a dream about illicit sex can be particularly disturbing to someone in a wholesome committed relationship. But he advises dreamers not to become too alarmed. “These unsavory scenes that we dream about are rarely to be taken literally,” he says.  

According to Rivinus, author of the book “Always Dreaming,” dreams speak in metaphors. “It’s important to examine each dream symbol for its most generic, general meaning,” he says. For example, sex is a form of bonding, and bonds can take place on many levels. Another word describing the sex act is “intercourse.” Says Rivinus, intercourse can imply many different things metaphorically, from conversation to commerce to social activity.  

One of the biggest mistakes a dreamer can make, according to Rivinus, is to confront a colleague or an acquaintance who made an appearance in a sexual dream. “This tends to lead to misunderstandings and hurt feelings,” he says, “or worse, to fuel conjectured interest in a sexual affair.” Usually such assumptions are incorrect. 

Rivinus offers the following case history. A young male employee dreamed that he had sex with his female employer. But he had sense enough not to discuss this dream with her. Instead he came to Rivinus for an interpretation. What emerged was that the employer was the dreamer’s symbol for the work experience. He had been struggling at his job for a while, but suddenly had a success which boosted his confidence and changed his attitude about his employment. “The dream was pointing out to him that he was bonding with his work environment at a more fulfilling level; this dream had nothing to do with making love to a woman.” Rivinus adds that, had he made advances to his employer based on his dream, it would probably have been disastrous for his job.  

Rivinus advises dreamers not to jump to conclusions about sexual symbolism in dreams. “Don’t be alarmed,” he says, “but don’t act as if they are intended literally, either. It’s better to get some dream advice.”  

David Rivinus is a dream analyst with over four decades of international experience. For more information, visit www.teacherofdreams.com